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Part 3: 3 Tips to Keep Going When You Are Stuck in a Nasty Divorce

Wednesday, 3rd September 2014

30452101Divorce can take over your life if you are not careful. We are going to explore three tips that you can use to keep your divorce from getting out of control and dominating your life.

  • Chop Down to Size. There are so many moving factors that a person going through divorce has to deal with. They have to deal with the actual divorce and work to come to terms with the other party. They have to deal with transition and with their living conditions being different. Many divorcing couples also have children to deal with and the unraveling of how their new status will affect their friendships. Plus there are always money issues and dealing with the unknown.

The best way to plow through all these issues is to take them one at a time and figure out what the basic things that you can do right now are, do those and put all the other issues on hold.

  • Secure the Foundation. No matter what stage you are in, from just finding out that you are going through a divorce, to getting close to the finish line of having the divorce complete, it is important to work on making sure that you are building a foundation that makes your life secure. One of the best ways to know what needs to be done on your foundation, is to not be dependent on the divorce going the way you want. For example, to not bank on getting money from the other person, or getting the house, etc. Have a backup plan if things don’t go the way you wish.
  • Redefine your Purpose or Upgrade your Purpose. Many people, before they start going through a divorce, have linked their identity with building a life with the person they are now divorcing. It can be unsettling to no longer have that vision. Now is the time to come up with a new vision. Often times, especially at the beginning of the divorce, the person is not in the right place for a long term purpose or vision. At those times, create a shorter purpose, for example: I will make it a pleasant time for my children when they are with me.

A great way to prevent divorce from taking over your life is to chop what you need to do down to size, secure your foundation, and redefine your purpose. When you implement these principles, you will have an easier time moving on.

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