Understand the Financial Obligations of Your New Spouse

Monday, 20th July 2009


Money is an ordeal for most couples. However, finances with remarried couples present extra problems, primarily because divorced pairs often have a hard time disentangling their finances from ex-spouses. In addition, alimony and child support are two of the areas where divorced couples’ finances cause challenges. A therapist shared: I have heard countless stories from men and women who complain about the new spouse’s financial struggles with the ex. Some of the most common problems include late child support payments, medical bills, business asset division, the selling of the home or other assets, and hidden money. Since divorce is often linked to financial problems, many divorced people end up going through bankruptcy. This, too, can cause resentment in the new relationship because of bad credit and (sometimes) outstanding financial obligations. Before remarrying, it is absolutely essential that you and your new partner discuss finances. Being completely open and honest about debt, spending habits, alimony, and child support payments will help you. If you understand each other’s finances and know what you’re getting into before you get married, you are much more likely to foster a team approach. You can be creative in your solutions.

Steps To Motivation

Monday, 13th July 2009


Secret #1: Proper Motivation

Secret #2: Positioning Your Environment For Success

Secret #3: Ridding Yourself of Weak-kneed Excuses

Secret #4: Turning Up the Heat on Luke-warm Desire

Key Points:

* Doesn’t matter how you motive yourself as long as:

  1. it is complimentary to your personality
  2. the method you use has sustainability.

* Timeline is important because:

  1. It keeps you focused on the goal and helps you overcome many of the distractions.
  2. Like what my children found when they didn’t have enough time to argue with me about the guidelines, you have to give up all the excuses or the doubts that the task set out before you is impossible—and get to work.

* Choosing what to be motivated by, is not a list of “shoulds” and “oughts,” but is your choice.

* Change your environment to be supportive of your goals.

* Align your goals with your values.

* Excuses will keep you from living a bigger life.

The Hard Decision

Monday, 6th July 2009


Making the tough decision to do the hard work doesn’t happen naturally for most of us. In fact, if my children are any indicator of what is natural human behavior, our first impulse is to look for any way to get out of work.

When I announce dish duty at the beginning of a chore season, I sometimes get tears and debates about why dishes are not appropriate for that particular child. Either they already learned the dish-doing skill or another sibling hasn’t had as much opportunity to do the dishes. They will say and argue whatever is necessary to avoid the task.

How many of us are exactly like that when it comes to . . . let’s say . . . tax season? We feel like we shouldn’t have to worry about this. Or we wish we didn’t have to mess with that. Although my children don’t like the consequences when they don’t do the dishes, I can tell you that the consequences of not paying your taxes are worse.